27 July 2014

Chez Ogg's Paleo Menu

Welcome to Chez Ogg! Chef de cuisine Ogg Urggghock welcomes you! I'll be your server, my name is Jacques!

Tonight, for starters, we have a lovely Woolly Mammoth app from our Paleolithic menu. It is served on a bed of Giant Fern and pairs nicely with a Ginkgo Biloba martini. 

If you are Mammoth-intolerant, we have Pleistocene Mastodon prepared with a Stemonitis Fusca slime mold and blanched Lycopodium (common name Club Moss).

We also have a delicious semi-extinct Coelacanth from the Deep Madagascar Trench. 

In our Precambrian short menu, we are please to offer a Chez Ogg first!  Rock-star gastronimie de genetique, Jacques Viz-a-Vichyssoise has created a fully cloned Giant Mollusk hailing from 540 mille-mille-de-B.C., which serves twenty (gratuity included). It is, of course, served on a bed of deep-ice-core slices with a Stromatolite garnish. 

Mon Dieu! Garçon!  Bring a clean flint hand-axe immediately for monsieur!

And the Jurassic special tonight... we have shaved Pterodactyl egg au fossile.

Bon Appétit!

05 March 2014

Song Lyrics: Bought Myself a Flower

Yes I'm feeling so much better 'cuz I bought myself a flower
I bought myself a flower 'cuz I had a shitty corporate day
I was feeling kinda dirty gettin paid by the hour
by a startup that might as well be the NSA

So I went out on a walk
bought some farmers-market kale
a bag of orange cuties
saw some tulips blowing kisses
so I bought myself a flower
and I took myself to dinner
and I drank a bottle of wine
and now I'm feeling fine

Yes I'm feeling really great
'cuz I make a great date
even bought myself a flower.

[copyright (c) 2014 Laramie Crocker]